You know the video: a dapper man stands before a projected slide on a perfectly matte-white wall, and with much gusto, tells us again just how excited we should be about our educational opportunity with him. It’s a one time offer, after all.
He’s going to teach us amazing things about where we lack confidence and focus and some key skills to be successful that we’ve clearly overlooked in all our years.
You notice your heart beat faster as you hear “At the end of the video I’ll tell you the 5 things that get in YOUR way.” You search for the scroll bar, but there isn’t one – these new systems prevent you for fast forwarding…
With bated breath you continue listening to the video and wonder why you’re wasting your time this way, on yet another product that sounds like everything else, but you just can’t help yourself. There’s something compelling about it.
Yes. It’s the basic principles of NLP and suggestion psychology being used to target the one common thing we have as humans (and especially as women, in my opinion)….
We’re afraid we’re missing something fundamental that – once recovered – will help us be REALLY successful.
But him? He seems to know it… He’s got it. Just look at his shirt.
Now this is a blanket statement, and it may not be true for everyone, but maybe it’s a little bit true? Maybe somewhere in there you don’t really think you can succeed. After all, there are so many voices, so many similar people out there talking about the same damn thing.
This is ok. We all have insecurities. But what does all this do to your marketing, or lack-there of?
What does this do to your brand? Or lack there of?
It then goes in one of two ways:
1) I should do it how he does it, even though it feels yucky.
We try on methods that don’t feel good, feel pressury, fallsey, and inauthentic. We get some marginal results but feel dirty all over.
2) We get stuck and think that because that guy seems to get it done, it’s the only way, but refuse to do it. So we do nothing.
This often leads to paralysis. We do nothing as a result because nothing feels authentic AND effective at the same time.
I know about these two very well.
So what’s the way out?
1) Pause and take a breath.
There is nothing wrong with you. If you’re a woman, your natural inclination is AWAY from videos of that nature. We are – I feel – wired for a different type of communication. The type that includes others, shares with others, etc., rather than isolating and beating them down. Then taking control and holding it over them. Very barbarian.
2) Think about your special message / business and those you want to work with / help.
Fall in love with it and them all over again.
When I write you, I really connect with you. I feel you. I ask myself – what’s helpful? How I can be more and more authentic? How can I be more honest? More real?
3) Put your message out there authentically.
We’re all different. As I discuss in my interview with Carrie of the Female Entrepreneur Association here, copying others is silly because it’s actually impossible to do well. People sniff out BS right away. We suck at being someone we are not.
But if we’re all different, why would our brands be the same? Our methods? Why would we all work the same way? Why would we speak the same way?
4) Get a handle on your own Brand Essences and start to understand the energy that they embody.
You can download the essences for free here. Based on Carl Jung’s Archetypes, it’s a table I’ve put together that I use with my clients all the time. It’s the core basis of successful branding work.
The reason we use it is that when you have a good idea of how to present yourself, who you’re working with and why you do it all, you can start to work authentically with your particular energy, putting your best foot forward in YOUR way.
There is no cookie cutter solution here… be authentic. Be you. You can be successful. I promise.